And Tonight's Customer Is..... and French Influence Mon cul

I've made mention a couple of times how relaxed the pace of business often is in Vietnam even though it can appear frenetic. This is due to the low cost of doing business here especially when it's often completely unlicensed, untaxed, and unregulated. The irony is just too rich that I've seen more pure capitalism in action here in the Socialist (recently communist) Republic of Vietnam than in my own country where almost every form of business is subject to some combination of heavy taxation, regulation, or government subsidy. It would do many an MBA or economics major a lot of good to come here and see how the machinery of commerce naturally forms and operates.

Often you will see similar or almost identical businesses lined up side by side down a street. Just outside my hotel here in Dalat are 3 carts, all identical, all manned(?) by a woman selling the same bread products, a distance of about 12 feet between them. I'm not really sure what the driver behind this sort of association is. Sometimes businesses will cluster to cut costs, but I'm guessing the dynamic in action in this case is that together they form a larger public front and it ends up benefiting them all with increased volume even though they share customers. Perhaps they even split their profits.

In Nha Trang I've enjoyed a few fresh seafood meals cooked and served on the sidewalk. These vendors display their wares, usually 3 or 4 different types of seafood, in metal dishes and wait patiently. Very patiently. It's not often you see an actual customer being served, but what a show to watch when it happens! I've been the center of this whirling vortex of activity each time I've stepped up to the plate and placed an order. After the scale is put away and your order fixed, 3 or more people immediately spring into action. The grill man (usually the only male in the operation) begins fanning the coals and mixing the sauces. 1 or 2 girls begin assembling and preparing greens for a salad while another rushes off to retrieve a plastic table and matching chair. If the plastic chair and table don't match, you might have fallen prey to a vendor who serves something less than haute sidewalk cuisine. Make a note of it. If you want to be a smartass, tell them you'd prefer to dine al fresco. The last time I dined a la sidewalk, the waitress enquired as to what I would like to drink. I decided the perfect pairing with the scallops and clams I ordered would be a Saigon beer, red of course. Green would be gauche. A quick exchange in Vietnamese followed and I looked up to see a man I hadn't noticed yet jump on a motorbike and take off. A few minutes later he returned with a plastic bag dangling from his handlebar containing ice and, you guessed it, a bottle of Saigon red. Now that's what I call attention and service! I was curious how annoyed they'd be if I quickly downed it and ordered another. But I didn't. The seafood I've had from these vendors has been exceptionally good every time. It's grilled with rich spicy sauces and served hot. If you're in Vietnam don't deny yourself this treat even though it may end up costing about 100,000 VND (about $5 US currently). It's very likely you'll be endowed with the honor of being the only customer of the night.

Most know the French were in Vietnam from sometime in the 1800's until around 1954 and their influence is still seen everywhere, especially in the architecture of the many beautiful buildings they erected and that are still in use often as government buildings or universities or museums. When I moved into my apartment last month, one of the top items on my to-do list was to purchase a French press coffee pot. I thought it would be no problem since the pedigree of the French press (La Presse Française) is true, unlike that of French toast. Well, I was wrong. I searched and searched all over District 1 of Saigon and could not find one until I ventured into that tourist trap known as the Ben Thanh market, a combination indoor/outdoor bazaar of everything you can imagine, and even catering to many local Vietnamese though I suspect at lower prices than the clueless tourists who just can't believe how cheap everything is. As I made my way through one of the many labyrinthine aisles, I gazed at a stall selling dishes and such and there it was! I heard angels sing and scooters roar. I rushed over and tried to hide my excitement because as Henry Kissinger said, 'we want to negotiate from a position of strength'. He of course was not referring to haggling over the price of a French press. 'How much?', I asked trying not to jump up and down. '200' was the reply. That's 200,000 VND. Not bad, but I had to bargain. I got the price down to 160 and was ready to buy when the girl told me to come back in 5 minutes and she'd have one in a box, so I left. And then something happened. Flush with my success, I decided that I could easily find another one in the market and bargain for a better price. But I didn't and I went home. I let another week go by and went back to the stall this time to make the purchase and be done with it. 'How much?', I asked again as if I'd never been there. '200' was the reply again. '160' was my counter. 'No' was the curt rude reply accompanied by a turn of the back. I stood there and steamed for a few seconds and she finally turned and countered with 180. 'No' I said and walked away, furious and indignant. Well, now I'd really done it. My only guess was that she was the same girl I had dealt with the previous week and she remembered me and was angry I hadn't returned to purchase the French press before. Vietnamese are extremely friendly, but when you cross a line with them they can really take it personally and turn nasty. I told myself there was no way in hell I would buy from that vendor. But weeks later and still unable to find another except at exorbitant prices in high-end stores I slinked back into the Ben Thanh market and stealthily crept up the aisle towards the stall to get a glimpse of who was there that day. She wasn't! All systems go, I rushed up and started the negotiation all over again. '180' was the gambit this time and and I quickly sealed the deal at 150 and took the display model and vanished into the crowd like some sort of pickpocket or bagsnatcher. I've been enjoying my French press every morning since and am extra cautious not to break it!





I rented a bike last time I was in Nha Trang and ventured almost 50 km up the coast to a shipping port and spied this one coming in. Roads in Vietnam are in good shape. I'm guessing the lack of cold weather must help a lot.









Some of the mountains north of Nha Trang. I don't believe there are many or any trails going into these areas. There could be some very good hiking and mountain biking there.

Maid in Sai Gon

I've now spent my first holiday season in Vietnam. It was, in a word, tropical. I don't believe I ever felt the temperature dip below 60 degrees F, but I did hear a lot of Christmas carols in both English and Vietnamese. I felt sorry for the staff at some of the cafes and shops as they had to endure looping soundtracks of these carols for days on end! But it added to the festive atmosphere here and since I was always free to remove myself from hearshot of the endless holiday music, it was pleasant for me. An amusing touch here is that many large trucks and heavy equipment when backing up in reverse gear, instead of emitting the monotonous beep you'd hear in America, play Christmas songs! I've been hearing it still so maybe it's a year-round phenomenon. So if you're in Vietnam and hear Christmas songs, instead of closing your eyes and nodding along, better look up!

On Christmas Day and also New Years Day I was in Nha Trang again. I decided it would be nice to 'get away' for a while. I really didn't think too much about it being Christmas Day on the 25th, but New Years was boisterous in certain parts of Nha Trang, particularly the Aussie-owned Sailing Club, which was blasting loud dance music to a throbbing crowd of dancers who'd paid admission to the venue (90% foreigners) and were accompanied by a large of crowd of non-paying dancers (90% local Nha Trang Vietnamese) around the fringes as the dance stage was outdoors protuding out onto the beach. It was fun to just watch and listen if nothing else.

I got to know some of the local Nha Trang outdoor vendors during my stay this time. These are people, mostly women, who sell food and drinks from their own small stands they set up and dismantle each day. On Jan. 3 I wandered down to the beach to find they were all gone. Turns out the police had staged a crackdown on these unlicensed and technically illegal merchants after the new year. I heard many stories of goods confiscated, some of which were returned. The generally accepted explanation for this police sweep was that too many tourists had complained of the vendors who pester them while they're trying to relax on the beach. I can understand this perfectly well and agree with them to a large degree. Thing is, the vendors who were targeted by the police are not the ones the tourists complain about because the police targeted the staitonary vendors while the pests are the vendors who walk the beach approaching sunbathing tourists and hawking mostly sunglasses and other such goods. There was uncertainty as to whether this imposition of the law would be more strictly enforced from there on, but it is clear that Nha Trang is changing along with the rest of Vietnam. In Nha Trang more and more upscale hotels and other commercial establishments are springing up and pieces of prime beach are slowly being privatized and cordoned off with flags and fences. I've heard that up north in Da Nang, the public no longer has access to any nice beaches, only paid hotel and resort guests. Progress? Yes and no IMO.

Anyway one of the vendors I chatted with quite a lot was Quyen (sounds like Quinn) who is in her mid-30's and would like to find a husband or boyfriend to help her out with things. She is divorced with 2 kids and apparently supports herself and family by selling cold drinks from her cooler at the Nha Trang beach (assuming the police will let her continue that is). I let her know straight off I was not a candidate! Let's just say she's not my type, but she's very funny and quite the character. If a tourist tried bargaining with her too much she would call him a 'Cheap Charlie' straight to his face! But she did it in such a joking manner, that noone got offended. She went on to tell me she used to like younger men, but had changed her mind and now wanted someone 50 or older. Of course I had to enquire what was behind this dramatic change and was informed that older men have more money and don't like 'boom-boom' as much. I think you can figure out what 'boom-boom' is even if you've never heard it before! It's a term you'll hear all over SE Asia. Anyway Quyen told me when she gets home at night now she's tired and has no time or energy for boom-boom. So any guys who are interested can (hopefully) find Quyen right in the central Nha Trang beach area, but just remember to bring your wallet and 'she no like boom-boom'! I doubt a line will form right away. But buy a beer or soft drink from her and help her out.

I moved out of the mini-hotel that had been my home for over a month into an apartment not far away. I had gotten to know the staff at the hotel including one of the maids who invited me up to rooftop with her. She spoke no English and I hardly any Vietnamese, so this was a venture for me. The rooftop was very pleasant, with a nice breeze and laundry waving lazily and she had constructed a Buddhist shrine up there complete with photos of (I assume) family members, incense, and the fruit offerings you see often at Buddhist shrines. The fruit is an offering to Buddha and if it doesn't get taken (does it ever?), it later gets consumed by Buddha's lowly human admirers who have actual worldly appetites. My maid, who seemed to like me for some reason, would often give me second right of refusal on Buddha's fruit offerings, Buddha himself of course having had first right. She would bring the fruit into my room and arrange it nicely inside my little room refridgerator, and when she knew I was there, would knock and the door and come in and sit on the floor and peel the fruit and serve it to me. I'll just assume she had a lot of free time on her hands. Some of the fruit I was completely unfamiliar with and would not have known how to eat otherwise. I miss her and the other staff there, but now have new staff at my apartment building. Noone had offered to peel and serve me fruit there yet, though!

It occurred to me that the populated areas of Vietnam are like a large collection of little families who occupy a given parcel of real estate or a building. If you frequent any building, park, street, etc. you tend to see the same clan of people congregated around the same place day after day as if they're physically attached to the area or maybe they get an electric shock if they venture too far astray. Vietnamese think of themselves as a big family and their language reflects that. Of course sometimes they attack and kill each other, but what family is perfect after all?

Nice fruit arrangement in my mini-hotel fridge courtesy of my friendly maid. How could Buddha have turned this down?!

Christmas Day at Nha Trang, VN. 'I'm

Dreamin' of a White (sand) Christmas'.